The Mercedes Blogs II- Dealing with Disappointment


Hi Guys,

It’s been a while. Sorry for the delay, was caught up in too many things workwise, and even with the family. The kids had their summer vacation, so we had to spend more time with them too.

What am I going to talk about this time? Well, Mercedes released a new video, about a Google employee, who talks about how the car saved his life once. 

The video is here:

 

In a candid chat he describes how he wasn’t paying attention while driving as he approached a static car in front of him. His Mercedes’ sensors kicked into action and automatically stopped the car from hitting another car in front. You can tell from his voice that he is being genuine, and grateful that he avoided a major crash. Something about the video works; perhaps it is the real person, his family shots or the feeling that this could happen to any of us.

Like I said, I am not obligated to talk about Mercs in this blog, but I really believe this is one cool feature to have in a car.

But what touched me about the video was the fragility of life. We have a world around us – our jobs, families, aspirations and dreams, and in one moment it can all change. We spend years trying to build something, but it could be gone in seconds. A job loss, health issues, relationship break-ups – can all change everything in an instant. Has that ever happened to you?

The question then is, how does one deal with this disappointment? How does one accept a sudden, big loss? It is a question I grapple with, for even small setbacks can cause a lot of distress.

There are no easy answers. Neither am I an expert in handling disappointment. I am also learning, and would love your thoughts on how you handle setbacks in your life.

Here is what I can say based on my experiences so far. The fact is, when disaster happens, one has to struggle to cope. There is a period of suffering that cannot be avoided. It is an emotional time, and as they say in yoga, one has to ‘breathe through it’. That is to have awareness about yourself, and not trying to snap out of it. You cannot snap out of it. The only thing to note is that this is not a time to make big decisions. You have to let the emotions pass, or at least subside a little.

For eventually, the human spirit is resilient. It can handle the toughest of times. In history, humanity has suffered immensely due to natural disasters or wars. It just cannot do it in an instant. The time varies for people, but eventually, people come to terms with a situation.

Once emotions settle, one has to reflect on what happens next. One needs to make a new path, based on the new reality. Whether it is a break-up, or a job loss or you lose someone close – your life has to discover new meaning. Once you accept this reality and want the answers – they come. Slowly, life changes again. You meet new people. You find other worthwhile things to do. Life goes on.

Disappointment is one of the nastiest aspects of the human condition. Some say non-attachment is the answer. It may be true. But to live a life devoid of all attachments isn’t quite possible too. Hence, disappointment will come into your life, at regular intervals. Accept it, and it becomes a little easier to deal with.

You are welcome to put your thoughts in the comments section. Similarly, I’d invite you to read other people’s insightful comments too.

Lots of love,

Chetan Bhagat


75 Comments

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  1. N R Sunil says:

    Hi Sir

    Great thought..It inspired me.

  2. Thendral says:

    Disappointment is a really hard thing to overcome in life. Life cannot be neither be filled with happiness nor sorrow always. Every situation is just a stop for us to learn and keep moving on.
    I feel that disappointments mostly occur due to the regrets when one makes a mistake in taking or making a decision rightly. Though it pains a lot and takes a lot time to overcome, It makes a huge impact in one’s life to ensure that such moments never happen again in his life !!

  3. prasanna says:

    dissappiontment a real good topic to speak upon and chetan he is d best .i liked every bit of dat writing ……..asking me im just 16 and my problems may not seem of a great issue to a lot of so cld grown ups .but these things they just hinder my smile n put me to this :-( face .but i try my best to come out of dat.i just say to myself ,i can actually say i remind myself dat “dude sorrow is nt the whole life n u wnt be dis way just aftr a month or so ……. so just try to be calm n chill on buddy as gods great n wil let u find a way :-0)…..

  4. thanks for this post….rgds sundari

  5. Paresh soni says:

    Whatever the reason behind the disappointment ,it is always hard to overcome. First of all accept the situation as it is,secondly put your attention to those things which you like most .met those people who are with you in your good times . Last but not the leapt see the situation as a testing time for you ,and result in the development of certain skills , which helps to you to face this situation as well as make a great future ahead.

  6. 0gravity says:

    Thank you for the info

  7. You spend your time with you family, Its so nice in hearing. I like it.. I am bigger bigger fan of yours. And I like your all blogs and all activities that you have done….

  8. seo services says:

    Its a nice post. Here you share your personal life experience and a great journey with your family. Its so nice thing. I like it so much.

  9. Whatever the reason behind the disappointment, it is always hard to overcome. First of all accept the situation as it is,secondly put your attention to those things which you like most. Met those people who are with you in your good times.

  10. agreed…with what u said above…
    to add…if we do not make any mistake in our like but there are some situations where others mistake can harm or hurt us.

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    I really inspired with your thoughts. I like you so much.

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  13. Great thought Thanks

  14. caren says:

    Very true…….it takes the toughest time to overcome disappointments in life but its d best lesson we ever learn….

  15. agreed…with what u said above…
    to add…if we do not make any mistake in our like but there are some situations where others mistake can harm or hurt us.

  16. Garima says:

    Hey Chetan! Should I call it a coincidence to have visited your website first time..randomly choose a blog to read and it turns out to be about disappointment when I am dealing with one.
    Well as you said detachment could help but its not possible to be detached. Sometimes it is easy for people who set no higher goals or aim big, coz whatever happens they are contented. But is it even possible I wonder to live without any aim in life. Disappointment shakes the very ground under the feet, makes everything looks hazy..looks like the this is the end..you feel to give up. What I learned from life is it does not end, so why give up when a new day is ought to come, when you are ought to live why not live with vigor because ultimately nothing is permanent. And life would not be fun if it runs the way we wanted it to:)

  17. Sudhir Gangadhar says:

    Chetan,
    This is my first visit to your website and so impressed with your blogs. Not that I haven’t read your work before, specially your columns in newspapers and magazine but your blogs are so very inspiring and full of reality.
    Being a senior level executive in a renowned corporate firm, I have attended so many seminars and workshops about what disappointment is and how to overcome the fear of disappointments. But your thoughts and explanation is so very simple and motivating. I had been though a very rough patch regarding my health in last couple of years and I am grateful to god and family for giving me strength to overcome all of those fears. From my personal exp I can easily relate to exactly what you have written in your blog. “For eventually, the human spirit is resilient. It can handle the toughest of times”. This is so very true for all the human beings. Any one who understands the strength of self belief can really overcome the toughest of times.
    Once again Chetan appreciate your good work and keep it up!!

  18. Dannielle says:

    Just desire to say your article is as surprising.
    The clarity on your put up is just nice and i could suppose
    you are a professional in this subject. Well together with your permission allow me to grasp your RSS feed to
    keep updated with forthcoming post. Thanks one million and please
    carry on the gratifying work.

  19. Dhwani says:

    i am reading this sitting in my office and had made me realize how important it is to live your dream beyond anything. Thank you Chetan.

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